Loneliness is one of the most difficult emotions to deal with after a divorce. As a divorce strategist, in addition to dealing with the practicalities of the divorce process, I assist clients struggling with this issue and help them to overcome it. Loneliness is an isolating feeling and can make people feel hopeless. It’s becoming a growing concern in our technologically modern times. Approximately, one in five people suffer from loneliness. It can even negatively impact our physical health, leading to heart disease and depression. Recent research has determined that social media is actually exacerbating the problem of loneliness. Instead of bringing people together authentically, people are feeling even more disconnected from others. However, overcoming loneliness is possible.
Here are five tips to combat loneliness after divorce.
Tip #1: Accept Your Situation
First, accept where you are in your situation. Accept your feelings as a normal part of healing and moving forward. When you acknowledge and accept these feelings, you can start to overcome them. Identify what causes you to feel most lonely and what led to these feelings of loneliness. Many people find that by uncovering the root of the loneliness, they can start to get past it.
Tip #2: Surrender to the Loneliness
Free yourself from distractions and stop trying to “fight” the loneliness. Surrender and “give into” the loneliness. While this may seem counter-intuitive, by embracing the loneliness, you’ll be able to release it. Sometimes, the more we fight something, the more the energy of it envelopes us. By acknowledging the loneliness and allowing the feelings, we can start to overcome them.
Tip #3: Put Self-Care as a Priority
A huge step in overcoming loneliness is to make taking care of yourself a priority. It’s important to maintain a healthy lifestyle after a break up. It may be tempting to overindulge in food and alcohol to temporarily numb your feelings. However, it’s even more essential during this highly stressful time to eat nutritional foods that give you energy, exercise regularly, rest, and find healthy outlets for stress.
Tip #4: Release Your Feelings Through Writing
A great tool for overcoming loneliness is journaling. Write about your feelings so you can sort them out and process them. Release your toxic emotions in your writing, but also take stock of those things in your life for which you are grateful each day. By identifying and spending time on the positive things in your life, you’ll feel more uplifted. This will give you a more positive and balanced perspective of your situation.
Tip #5: Seek Authentic Connections
Find ways to connect with others. It may be tempting to sit at home and stay isolated. However, once you’ve taken some time to reflect and sit with your loneliness, it’s important to get back out into the real world and start making authentic connections. Reconnect with old friends, reach out to groups that share your interests and make new friends. Join a book club, a MeetUp group, or find events at your local library that you can join. Volunteer at a charity or an organization that represents a cause you believe in. You’ll bond with others who share your interests and core values.
Going through divorce and processing all the emotions that it brings during this time is difficult. It’s important to find the support that you need. Having a divorce strategist on your team can help you to navigate through the process in order to move forward to rebuild your life. She can help you develop strategies that will release what the emotions that are holding you back or causing you to make decisions that aren’t in your long-term best interest. She will help you to execute the activities to reach the goals you have in your next chapter.